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133

L. Neil Smith's
THE LIBERTARIAN ENTERPRISE
Number 132, August 6, 2001
Did I Mention, Let's Secede?

LibBits

Send to [email protected]


RANT

Want to talk dependent clauses? Well, if you're a 'hoplophobe', here's a bitter pill for you to swallow:

"Religion, morality, and knowledge, being necessary to good government and the happiness of mankind, schools and the means of education shall forever be encouraged" -- Northwest Ordinance of 1787, at http://www.law.ou.edu/hist/ordinanc.html

So, if your mentally-ill 'logic' about the right to keep and bear arms is consistently applied, then your position must be, by extension, "schools and the means of education" are strictly limited to supporting the introduction of "religion, morality, and knowledge" to their students. (And don't even get me started on an obsessive-compulsive parsing of the meaning of "religion, morality, and knowledge", such as you apply to the simple meaning of "well-regulated". )

Since I know you don't believe these things, it's time for you to re-examine the language of the Second Amendment, admit either to your deceit or to your gross ignorance, and then ...

Shut The **** Up!

Source: Editor, TLE [[email protected]]


HERE COME DA JUDGE!

There's hope yet for our judicial system. As long as there lives one judge such as this, it's not yet a total loss! (Yes, this is a real case!)

Excerpt from order granting motion for summary judgment:

Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who have together delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact � complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words � to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions.

With Big Chief tablet readied, thick black pencil in hand, and a devil-may-care laugh in the face of death, life on the razor's edge sense of exhilaration, the Court begins.

Source: http://www.nationalreview.com/document/document073001.shtml


KILL THE PIG!

DENVER �� Colorado corrections officials are investigating a youth camp where campers threatened counselors with rocks and sticks during a weekend outing.

Camp officials said the incident occurred Sunday at a camp 35 miles south of Grand Junction, Colo. Counselors working for Alternative Youth Adventures of Loa, Utah, called sheriff's deputies for help.

"The boys literally talked each other up and it escalated," said Ben Harris, the program's director. "They were saying stuff like, 'We'll bash your head in.'" . . .

Source: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/aponline/20010730/aponline213356_000.htm


BIG BUGGAH IS WATCHING!

WASHINGTON �� By bugging a keyboard or using special software, FBI agents can remotely capture a computer user's every keystroke.

With a black box, they can intercept e-mail from miles away.

In a van parked outside, they secretly can recreate the pictures on a computer screen from its electromagnetic energy.

The legal limits for these new investigative tools will get a test Monday when a federal court in New Jersey examines a mob case in which agents, without a wiretap order, recorded a suspect's computer keystrokes.

Source: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/aponline/20010728/aponline122313_000.htm



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