LibBits
Collected by Ken "Not Mr. Ed" Holder
[email protected]

From the "I Can't tell Satire from Hard News Anymore" file:

"Citing the need to safeguard 'America's most vital institutions and politicians' against potentially devastating attacks, President Bush asked Congress to sign off Monday on a $30 billion funding package to help fight the ongoing War On Criticism. 'Sadly, the threat of criticism is still with us,' Bush told members of Congress .... 'We thought we had defeated criticism with our successes in Afghanistan and Iraq. We thought we had struck at its very heart with the broad discretionary powers of the USA Patriot Act. ... Yet, despite all this, criticism abounds.'" [satire] (07/02/03)

Source: http://www.theonion.com/onion3925/bush_asks_congress.html

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