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L. Neil Smith’s THE LIBERTARIAN ENTERPRISE
Number 920, April 30, 2017

What the hell ever happened to “sticks and stones”?

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Imaginary Crimes
by L. Neil Smith
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Attribute to L. Neil Smith’s The Libertarian Enterprise

I have often compared American socio-politics today, with religio-politics during the Tudor era in England. King Henry VIII and Elizabeth I. In those days, all that it took to get your enemies out of power and pointed toward the head-chopping block was to catch them saying publicly or writing the politically incorrect thing about theology, quoting, for example, yesterday’s popular opinion about the use of a comma instead of a semicolon in the Book of Common Prayer.

The latest, most dangerously absurd case in point is that of Fox News host Jesse Waters who, it would appear, has been suspended (an infantile practice if there ever was one) by his increasingly unstable television network for defending Ivanka Trump from ugly, rude, and noisy attackers when she visited Germany earlier this month and defended her father from the feminist mob. It seems that Jesse’s defense of Ivanka’s voice was too admiring, and “therefore”, sexist and it was for this unspeakable offense that he was removed, however temporarily, from our gaze.

This was close on the heels of Sean Hannity being accused of some unspecified sexual threat he had apparently posed to an unnamed woman who, it turns out, has a long psychopathological history of making such accusations. The implication was that, in this instance, she had allegedly been paid to point the finger at Fox’s second most valuable star, but hastily withdrew the charge when he threatened to fight back—with lawyers. When you try to calculate who might have paid her, keep in mind that all of the “offenses” committed by Fox’s most valuable star, Bill O’Reilly, now looking for a job somewhere else, were purely verbal. Apparently he called a black woman whom he admired, “hot chocolate” (one doubts whether this was actually an insult—it sounds like admiration to me). In any event, what the hell ever happened to “sticks and stones”?

Or the First Amendment?

There is some speculation that Fox’s rapid disintegration may be occurring from the inside. Since Roger Ailes, the genius who also gave us Rush Limbaugh, possibly saving Western Civilization, was ousted in pretty much the same way as O’Reilly (without a hearing, trial, or any other form of adjudication) the network owner, Rupert Murdoch, is about to hand it over to his sons, Thing One and Thing Two, who are “liberals”—British liberals. Their mission is to purge it of people like Tucker Carlson and turn it into a non-threatening clone of NBC or MSNBC. And, indeed, one Bill Shine, the operations boss is about to get the same Salem Witch treatment, over Ailes’ alleged transgressions. It looks like Hannity is threatening to quit if that happens, and start a new network.

I’m with him.

Alleged sexism, it would appear, is the new alleged racism—the all-purpose accusation. Ironically I once planned a science fiction novel (you would have liked it) in which humanity had recently become extinct because, since approaching a female sexually was made an unlawful act, and even looking at her “wrong” was equally punishable (Ethological fact: when a man looks at a woman from her eyes, all the way down to her toes, and back up slowly to her eyes again, he is unconsciously estimating her reproductive suitability—it’s a reflex—if he didn’t have it he’d be an evolutionary failure.), the species was unable to breed and died out. If you think that’s fanciful, just check out the number of lovely Russian, Eastern European, and Asian “mail- order” brides coming to this country lately, ordered by men thoroughly fed up with irrational neo-Puritanical regulations made by ugly and unpleasant American females. And it says here, robot sex-partners are on the way, too.

But once again, I have digressed.

Not all of the transgressions that precious snowflake-thugs accuse real human beings of are sexual in nature. The most ludicrous I’ve heard of is “cultural appropriation”. If I were sitting here, writing this in my sombrero and grass skirt, instead of a t-shirt and jeans, I would be guilty of it. If I adopt any custom, article of clothing, item of cuisine, (yes, chili beans are evil, and kung-pao is beyond the pale) or turn of phrase from another culture (G’day, cobber!), I can be accused—and gotten rid of—by the Cult of Correctness.

But here’s the thing: there is no original American culture. The way we live —pass the spaghetti, please—is made up of bits and pieces from hundreds of different cultures, all mixed delightfully together. I can have Mexican beer—made by German brewers—with my pizza (or kung-pao) and my life is enriched. It is America’s great strength. The leftist crybullies know this, of course. I think it may have been Ayn Rand (we appropriated her from Russia) who pointed out the underhanded collectivist tactic of attacking a person or thing for its virtues.

If I eschew tableware (a French invention, I believe) and knap myself an obsidian knife before dinner, am I appropriating Neanderthal culture?

They don’t give a rat’s ass; it’s just another thing to get people they don’t like with. Whether they know it or not (most likely they do not), their moral exemplars are Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, who infamously said “Property is theft.” and Jean-Jacques Rousseau, who commanded them to “Eat the rich.” So deep and ancient is their resentment of the achievements of others and despite the fact that their ideological leaders have all hypocritically gorged themselves at the public trough, that they’d insanely rather see the right-wing wealthy destroyed than have enough to eat, themselves. This is the main reason they hate Donald Trump so bitterly. It has nothing otherwise to do with his politics, which they’re incapable of understanding. They also hate him because he has a beautiful wife and two beautiful daughters which he somehow doesn’t deserve.

I have had to study this attitude exhaustively, as a part of my explorations of the authoritarian personality, because I do not comprehend it. I have never had any money to speak of in my life, and at my present age, likely never will. But I do not envy or resent those who have money; that would be nuts. I have thirty-four books to my credit, a nice little house whose walls are lined with musical instruments, a red-headed wife whom friends of mine compare to Wonder Woman, and a golden blonde daughter in the same league of beauty and brains as either of the Trump girls. The rich made their choices and I have made mine, and while it might be nice to be wealthy (it mostly looks like a lot of trouble to me) taking somebody else’s money away from them is not an ethical way to get there. (It would be nice, I admit, to go everywhere in a helicopter or a private jet—make mine a Gulfstream.)

Proudhon and Rousseau are bandits on the highway of life, their “philosophies” a crude attempt to render theft respectable. And their vile spawn, Anti-fa, are giving anarchism a bad name. And that is the naked, unvarnished truth. Life is hard enough without trying not to commit “microaggressions” which are simply another way of playing the leftist Gotcha! game with people who actually work—and think—for a living.


L. Neil Smith

Publisher and Senior Columnist L. Neil Smith is the author of over thirty books, mostly science fiction novels, L. Neil Smith has been a libertarian activist since 1962. His many books and those of other pro-gun libertarians may be found (and ordered) at L. Neil Smith’s THE LIBERTARIAN ENTERPRISE “Free Radical Book Store” The preceding essays were originally prepared for and appeared in L. Neil Smith’s THE LIBERTARIAN ENTERPRISE. Use them to fight the continuing war against tyranny.

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