Big Head Press

L. Neil Smith's
Number 403, January 28, 2007

"Americans do not have a government suited to a free people."


A Few Reasons to Own Guns
by Darian Worden

Attribute to The Libertarian Enterprise

Less reliance on others for enjoying the right to life.

Nobody has the right to keep you from owning or carrying any gun you want, so don't let that get in your way.

Because governments "of the people" might decide that you are not one of the people.

A disarmed population is at the mercy of the armed.

Someone who threatens an innocent person forfeits his right to not get shot by doing so.

Reduce Crime in Your State

Reduce crime in Your Country

Owning a gun makes you cooler if you use it right.

Bring chicks shooting.

Bring guys shooting.

Preserve historic artifacts.

Relying solely on bludgeons and sharp things for protection is SO last millennium.

Shooting stuff is fun and there are so many different ways to enjoy it.

Why would you put your life in the hands of a person who just expressed willingness to harm you?

How do you know he only wants your wallet—only wants to steal that portion of your life in which you acquired what he means to take?

Cultivate your appreciation for technology.

Kill inferior animals to sustain and improve your life.

Killing an animal yourself shows that you are able to take responsibility for your own sustenance, instead of simply passing the death in your diet off to someone else.

Look at a few things the most powerful government in the world has done recently.

An armed populace has no need for a large standing army to protect it. If there is no standing army, national leaders will have nothing to use when they want to project their power around the world, so there will be fewer wars. The cycle of armed robbery at home to finance armed robbery and murder abroad will therefore be diminished. So do your part for world peace by practicing with a military arm that you own.

Shooting increases mental discipline and physical endurance. It is a sport that hones fine motor skills while making mental functions work together with body movement.

Every gun you have is a gun kept out of the wrong hands.

With so many different models and calibers of firearms out there, there are plenty of gun-related things to debate and argue about endlessly if you are into that kind of thing.

Every time you buy a semi-automatic rifle, Diane Feinstein gets another gray hair under her nose.

You never know when you might be helped out by having one. A gun in the holster is better than one in the safe is better than one in the police car ten minutes away.

Bad things do happen, and a handy gun can help you get through it.

Statistically, you might not be likely to be a victim. But are statistics really something to bet your life on? If you think so, consider the fact that resisting with a gun is statistically the safest response to an attempted crime.

Think of all the people who don't want you to have a gun—a bunch of thugs, control freaks, criminals, and bigots. Don't you want to do something that will piss them off?

Those who prey on other humans really shouldn't get to reproduce anyway.

Stockpiling guns and ammunition is fun. You'll see.

Show your appreciation for gender equality by owning a weapon that the average woman can use just as effectively as the average man—unlike weapons that rely on the power of large muscles for proper operation.

Nearly anybody can kill anybody with a gun. It is therefore the most egalitarian weapon and only an elitist snob would dislike guns for this fact.

The police are not legally required to protect you.

Americans use firearms defensively approximately 2 million times annually.

Guns are really cool.


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