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Dear Babby
by Don Childers
DLSeeAmerica -+at+- hughes.net

Attribute to The Libertarian Enterprise

Dear Babby,

A dear friend of mine has been married to the same worthless lout forever. She's miserable in the relationship, and of course that means I hear all the messy details.

To begin with, he doesn't work, so he takes half of every paycheck, right off the top. He gives some of it back to her to help with the kids and such, but most simply gets spent for this and that. When she asks where it went, he just gives her some lame excuse and holds out his hand for more.

He also doesn't leave her much privacy. She knows that sometimes he listens in to her telephone conversations and reads her email and mail. There are some places she's not allowed to go at all, and he insists on inspecting her before she goes to some others.

To be fair, he does help out a bit, but mostly just what he can get away with. He's a smooth talker, so it always sounds like he's doing a lot more than he is. He always has something to say about a bright future right around the corner, though, and that keeps her hopes up.

However, he's been running up terrible amounts of debt, and every time she raises the issue he either gives her a pat on the head and sends her on her way, or just says that's the way it's gonna be and she needs to shut up and pay up.

The house is getting kind of old and rickety, but he never has money for house repairs, although he never runs out of money for things he wants, like beer or ammo. He never listens to her concerns, no matter how important they may seem to her.

He also has some strange hobbies, like buying a lot of guns and military gear. He has a nasty habit of wandering around the neighborhood telling people how to do things. If they don't do things the way he says, he sometimes beats them up.

She even tried to leave him once, but he beat her pretty throughly and told her she was committed forever, and he'd never let her leave.

I'm worried about my friend. She keeps asking me for advice. What can I tell her that may help?

Sincerely,

Worried in DC

Dear Worried,

Tell your friend to suck it up and do her patriotic duty. We're all married to Uncle Sam, whether we like it or not.

-B-

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