Joseph Biden*
A parody by L. Neil Smith
[email protected]
Attribute to L. Neil Smith’s The Libertarian Enterprise
Joseph Biden was a commie; one of Stalin‘s lads.
He was foully murdered by those counter-revolutionary cads!
Counter revolutionary cads, counter revolutionary cads!
He was foully murdered by those counter revolutionary cads!
Joseph went to heaven; he reached the Gates with ease,
Saying, "May I speak with Comrade God, I‘m Joseph Biden please.
I‘m Joseph Biden please, I‘m Joseph Biden please.
May I speak with Comrade God, I am Joseph Biden please."
"Who are you?" said Saint Peter, "Are you humble and contrite?"
"I‘m a friend of Sandy Cortez." "Well, okay, that‘s quite all right.
Okay, that‘s quite all right. Okay that‘s all right.
You‘re a friend of Sandy Cortez, so okay, that‘s quite all right."
They put Joe in the choir, but the hymns he did not like,
So he organized the angels and he led them out on strike.
Led them out on strike, led them out on strike.
He organized the angels and he led them out on strike!
One day when God was walking around heaven to meditate,
Who should he see but Biden chalkin‘ slogans on the gate?
Chalkin‘ slogans on the gate, slogans on the gate,
Who should he see but Biden chalkin‘ slogans on the gate?
Well, they brought Joe up for trial before the Holy Ghost,
For spreading disaffection amongst the heavenly host.
Amongst the heavenly host, amongst the heavenly host.
For spreading disaffection amongst the heavenly host!
The verdict it was guilty, Joseph said "Ah, well" ...
He tucked his nightie ‘round his knees and drifted down to hell.
Drifted down to hell, drifted down to hell.
Joe tucked his nightie ‘round his knees and drifted down to hell.
Now seven long years have passed, and Joe is doing swell.
He‘s just been made First People‘s Commissar of Soviet Hell.
Commissar of Soviet Hell, Commissar of Soviet Hell.
He‘s just been made First People‘s Commissar of Soviet Hell!
The moral of this story is easy for to tell,
If you want to be a Democrat, you‘ll have to got to hell.
You‘ll have to go to hell, you‘ll have to go to hell.
If you want to be a Democrat, you‘ll you‘ll have to go to hell!
* Apologies to the Limeliters
Award-winning writer L. Neil Smith is Publisher and Senior
Columnist of L. Neil Smith’s The Libertarian Enterprise and author of
over thirty books. Look him up on Google, Wikipedia, and Amazon.com. He is
available at professional rates, to write for your organization, event, or
publication, fiercely defending your rights, as he has done since the
mid-60s. His writings (and e-mail address) may be found at
L. Neil Smith’s The
Libertarian Enterprise, at
JPFO.org
or at
Patreon. His many
books and those of other pro-gun libertarians may be found (and ordered) at
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The preceding essay was originally prepared for and appeared in L. Neil
Smith’s THE LIBERTARIAN ENTERPRISE. Use it to fight the continuing war
against tyranny.
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