Attribute to L. Neil Smith’s The Libertarian Enterprise

Away out West in Flyover Country, we have seasonal contests of athletic prowess that we fondly call rodeos (accent on the first syllable unless you’re a California poseur). Based on various practical skills required by horse and cattle ranching, these competitions customarily pit cowboys against one another, and against large, powerful animals.

Okay, cowgirls, too.

One of the most popular and exciting events in rodeo is bull riding, a collection of feats that probably date back to ancient Minoan civilization or even further. In the Western American variation, a muscular young rider sits astride a gigantic untamed male bovine that doesn’t necessarily want to be ridden and does its damnedest to jump and twist and throw its rider to the ground, to gore him, and trample him to death. If that threatens to happen, colorfully-dressed and made-up individuals emerge, make a lot of noise, dance around, and generally attempt to distract the bull to keep the creature from injuring the rider with its terrible, deadly horns and hooves.

These are the rodeo clowns, an ancient, distinguished, and highly-necessary calling.

In some respects, this is precisely the function of such (vastly less noble, mind you) Democrats, in Congress and out, as Bernie Sanders, Andrew Cuomo, Eric Swalwell, Beto O’Rourke, Cory “Spartacus” Booker, Rob Reiner, Jim Carrey, also Sheila Jackson Lee, Theresa May, Madonna, Ashley Judd, Maxine Waters, Frederica Wilson, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Cher, Diane Feinstein, and the Queen of the Clowns herself, Hillary Rodham Clinton. (Now there’s a hell of a case of harpies.) They all act so absurdly, and say such idiotic and outrageous things, that they distract the voting public from much more dangerous, but far sneakier leftists who basically (in the eternal words of Bruce Willis) want to kill us and cook us, and eat us. This is just one of many dirty tricks that Marxoids try to play on those of us—the Productive Class—who actually build and earn and work for a living.

The notoriously round-heeled mass media, including our false friend FOX, assist these deceivers by giving them an infinite volume of undeserved publicity. The fake news companies know fully what they’re doing, too. Within their own little world, whenever a moron like Juan Williams, speaking for the Upper and Lower Parasitic Classes, is unavailable to face the horns and hooves of libertarians and conservatives, they haul in an alternate idiot like Marie Harf.

I suppose my point here is this: it’s bound to happen; whenever one of these despicable cretins shows up on TV or the radio, don’t strain yourself or worry about whatever they’re trying to say. Take them for what they are, and no more—professional funny people. Ignore them and look for the real villains lurking behind them and peering out over their shoulders, specimens like Michael Bloomberg, Bill de Blasio, Cherie Blair, John Hickenlooper, Mitch McConnell, Angela Merkel, Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi, Jared Polis, Mitt Romney, Paul Ryan, Adam Schiff, Chuck Schumer, George Soros, Pat Stryker, Tom Styer, and others far too numerous to list here. We may argue about who’s the clown and who’s the real threat.

They want us to.